We all have them. Physical scars. Emotional scars. Spiritual scars. They represent having survived a harm that has been done, a damage inflicted, but they also represent a healing has occurred, don’t they? To have a scar is not so much about what you survived, as it is about how you have healed from an affliction,Continue reading “Scars…”
Tag Archives: suicide
WW | Words of Wisdom | Letting Go . . . of . . . D E A T H
Suicide and death are such a common theme among incest survivors. You know why? It’s all murder, that’s why. I only saw my father a handful of times after that. He had chosen deceit and the battle between us was on. About six months before this illness, I’d dreamt that my father was milling aboutContinue reading “WW | Words of Wisdom | Letting Go . . . of . . . D E A T H”
WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | FAVOR
When I lived at home with my father, I was favored. His favor included being backhanded when I showed the slightest sign of disobedience, rape, sodomy and playing the game Risk. Oh, my family envied my favor with my father. You see, growing up in a home where the only attention you receive is abuse,Continue reading “WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | FAVOR”
WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | God Has the Final Say
Many of us are familiar with Romans 8:28 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” It’s a great scripture. This Scripture brings comfort, direction, and hope to Christians every day. While God can turn ugly situations aroundContinue reading “WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | God Has the Final Say”
WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | When Your Denial Causes Damage
Denial is the gift that helps us survive as children. I get it. I lived it. However, when we have children of our own or have a responsibility around children, denial most often becomes a tool of destruction. “Trauma denial may be helpful in the short term. It allows the trauma survivor to stand upContinue reading “WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | When Your Denial Causes Damage”
WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | Gentleness
The bible tells us a “tender reed will not be broken.” In my childhood, I was — broken. How do you give what you have never received? My children were born to a mother who had never seen tenderness. Cruelty was the character that ruled my life. How then was I to know what kindnessContinue reading “WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | Gentleness”
WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | Still Not Telling Your Story?
As a child, the first thing we learn when coming through childhood tragedies is to remain quiet. Don’t tell is the very first rule we are given. The problem is we did see, we did hear and we still didn’t tell. If we are ever going to change our pasts, we have to break theContinue reading “WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | Still Not Telling Your Story?”
WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | Birthed for Suffering?
There is a saying that “Jesus was born to die.” If Jesus was born to die, I was birthed to suffer. I don’t recall a day in my childhood that didn’t have suffering in it. Maybe I had moments where I enjoyed something – an ice cream, a bike ride, but there was always embeddedContinue reading “WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | Birthed for Suffering?”
WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | What Was Stolen from You?
When we learn to articiulate what our abuse took from us, we can grieve appropriately and begin to heal. If we sit in a muck of undiscovery, never articulating what we feel, we stay stuck, unhealed and a stranger to ourselves. Why discuss it? If you were a child when these sexual crimes happened toContinue reading “WWW | Wednesday Words of Wisdom | What Was Stolen from You?”
Why Do You Get Your Past, But I Don’t Get Mine?
If people with good childhoods get to tell their story and hang onto their past, why don’t those of us with bad upbringings get the same privilege? Everyone around me gets the privilege of recalling & telling childhood memories – except for me. Everyone reminisces about the stuff that made them who they are –Continue reading “Why Do You Get Your Past, But I Don’t Get Mine?”