Life’s Delicate Balance

I can have anger and not hate. I can love and not forgive. I can forgive and leave. The older I get the more I realize that life is about balance. Coming thru such severe childhood trauma I often get stuck in an off-balance kind of place — everything is good or everything is bad.Continue reading “Life’s Delicate Balance”

Controlled Anger

Tears have streamed down my face as I’ve been offered let down after let down in life. Example: My oldest daughter is hit in the face by her father. The police come and arrest him. During the interview, she tells the police officer and later child protective services that her father sexually abused her. Outcome:Continue reading “Controlled Anger”

Deliver Me

We don’t use this phrase often, but the bible does. The word deliver is a verb and means, provide (something promised or expected). I needed to be delivered from so many things. An abusive childhood, an awful marriage, addiction, depression, fear — I could go on and on. I needed deliverance. DELIVERANCE, n. 1. the actionContinue reading “Deliver Me”

INCEST Wants You Dead

My heart is grieved by the many suffering through addictions, disabilities, mental health issues like anxiety and eating disorders, and a plethora of other symptoms — too many to name here. God help us! We need to fight against this like we fight every other crime in America and around the world. Why aren’t weContinue reading “INCEST Wants You Dead”

Perishing in Despair

Childhood sexual abuse sucks the life from your bones. It lives under cover but it’s current is strong. The devastation it leaves in the children who are now grown is a brutal reality of what happened yesterday. You can run from it, but I guarantee you — you can’t hide. That is just the truthContinue reading “Perishing in Despair”


Anguish is pain that cannot be quenched. Anguish seeks its own desire — it wants the pain to stop. Anguish unrelenting speaks its voice of frustration against the lack of justice. Anguish is its name. The dark fury that rises from pain. Pain that has lasted decades upon decades. Anguish is the result of lasting,Continue reading “Anguish”


Imagine with me a victim that has lost their teeth. Their shame and pain would show, wouldn’t it? How much we all hide. We hide behind fake stories. We put on a distant smile. We cover our pain with fake hair, fake nails, and whatever else we can buy. If someone had the ability toContinue reading “Comfort”

On Rejection

Loneliness envelops the person that has been rejected. Light shines dimly from their eyes. The gathering of their soul mocks the ability to breathe. Oh, rejection, I’ve known it well. What is abuse if not the severest form of rejection? Even Jesus cried out on the cross, “My God, My God, why have you forsakenContinue reading “On Rejection”

Tortured, But Not Betrayed

If I were left with just my story, not sure I would have made it very far in life. The imprint of abuse left me serving the very people who tortured me. My chatter about God is not to be religious — its not to show now that I am good. It is the plightContinue reading “Tortured, But Not Betrayed”

Don’t Trespass

I wasted so many years trying to find the answers and solutions to my life visiting with my abusers. Incest is a gift that way. The ones who hurt you are your friends – they’re family. I wanted to love them and I wanted them to love me. I didn’t want to walk away withoutContinue reading “Don’t Trespass”

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