Cushioned with Belief

Fear of speaking about the atrocities perpetrated against me was a very real thing. Telling about the murder I witnessed was terrifying for years. Recalling the betrayal of my parents was almost surreal, as it carried with it an intense irrational reality. My faith in God it what has sustained me with strength, dignity andContinue reading “Cushioned with Belief”

Hope Springs Eternal

I had a ghastly beginning. I can’t know why and I just don’t ask that question any longer. The English poet Alexander Pope wrote, “Hope springs eternal in the human breast: Man never is, but always to be blest.” My sights are on eternity. How to get there and where I’m going is easy, thatContinue reading “Hope Springs Eternal”

The Police, The Grave, The Accomplice

In my last YouTube post, Part IV, explores the Vancouver Police Department involvement, the attempted excavation of the dumpsite where the murdered woman’s body is still buried and a recording of my visit to the accomplice. You can find the video series here: https://youtu.be/dX1nwDUP0mc. The conversation with this accomplice is frightening to hear. Join meContinue reading “The Police, The Grave, The Accomplice”

Regaining Your Experience

Don’t talk. Don’t tell. Don’t remember. This seems to be a constant reminder to adult’s who have experienced childhood trauma. They want to let their abusers live out their lives unnoticed or unaffected by their crimes. This saddens me deeply. The only way to regain those parts of ourselves that were stolen by the perpetratorsContinue reading “Regaining Your Experience”

A Gentle Harness

28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” matthew 11 (niv) I’ve heard this scripture ofContinue reading “A Gentle Harness”

The Raging Waters of Injustice

Healing is not the lack of some good, righteous anger. In fact, it very much is the start of it. What do I mean? Anger that leads to malice, harm and revenge is not the anger I’m talking about. The anger that stirs in a human heart when it to sees the atrocities of injusticeContinue reading “The Raging Waters of Injustice”

Curses & Betrayals

I had a presumptive contract with my parents when I was born to them. I had to trust them as I came into their world, I had no choice. Betrayal started at the moment I took my first breath into this world or maybe it started before I came out of my mother’s womb? IfContinue reading “Curses & Betrayals”

Squirming with Worry

I’ve been worrying lately. My worry is not around world issues but the turmoil of my past. When does it end? My mother is a very dark woman. I was reading today in Isaiah about the fall of Babylon. These words reminded me of my mother’s deliberate scheming: “Now then, listen, you lover of pleasure,    loungingContinue reading “Squirming with Worry”

Dissociated, Disjointed & Denial

The three D’s of survival. When I watched my father kill tiny kittens on a rough block of wood, I reached into my tool bag and sorted through my survival skills. Which of the three D’s would I use? Any of them could work. When I watched the blood seeping out of one of theContinue reading “Dissociated, Disjointed & Denial”