Gracious Gratitude

I shouldn’t be who I am. That’s one of the kindness gifts my counselor gave to me. He believed in me, until I believed in myself. I am so very grateful for all the work I’ve put in to changing the destiny my parents offered me. It’s taken a lot of forgiveness. That forgiveness hasn’tContinue reading “Gracious Gratitude”

A Casual Critic

When will my internal dialogue be good to me? If I spoke to others the way I sometimes speak to myself, I wouldn’t have very many friends. Do I call others fat? Do I tell other people they’re not good enough? How many times have I questioned the validity of another person’s dreams, hopes andContinue reading “A Casual Critic”

Associated with Thieves

My father used to tell me that “all people who steal, think that all people are thieves.” The problem with being raised by thieves was my associated connection to their wrong doing. They didn’t steal from the store or an organization. What they robbed was of far greater value. They ripped away my innocence andContinue reading “Associated with Thieves”

Gorged on Intelligence

“Brilliant!” We all like to claim. What I’ve learned is that knowledge without wisdom is useless. Gathering information like squirrels gather nuts, we all run around trying to protect ourselves with it. Our stomachs are bloated with knowledge and our souls are sick from lack of rest. “Learn more about your pain, do more self-care,Continue reading “Gorged on Intelligence”

War on Childhood Crimes

I read an article by Erica Terry titled, Sexual Abuse and the Hidden Children of the Holocaust. From that article, she writes: In fact, the pain of sexual abuse often impacts childhood survivors far greater than other losses and traumas endured during the Holocaust. In a 2006 study, the first of its kind, Professor Rachel Lev-Wiese ofContinue reading “War on Childhood Crimes”

Scars of Dichotomies

A dichotomy is a¬†difference between two completely opposite ideas or things. Growing up with incest in my home bred this constantly. A parent is supposed to love, support and protect. Mine did the very opposite. A parent should teach guidance about protecting your body against sexual advances from strangers. Ah, clearly, they took advantage ofContinue reading “Scars of Dichotomies”

D E A T H

And, despair. My childhood was plagued with signs of it. Beyond my reoccurring nightmare of my father raping a woman, I did many other strange things trying to work out this mysterious puzzle that I hid inside me. Trauma takes on funny ways of revealing itself when it is outside of your mind’s eye. TheContinue reading “D E A T H”

A Healing Balm

Incest left a scorched path of intolerable pain that I needed healing for. No amount of reparenting my soul was going to touch that pain. A yoga session was not going to be able to quench the sting of this long-laid plan to destroy parts of me and still the lost integrity to my soul.Continue reading “A Healing Balm”