Captured by Commitment

I’ve lived a squirrely life at times. What else could I expect? And then came the time when I committed to better things. I heard God’s voice calling to me in the desert, so to speak. I was parched and thirsty and in need of much repair. The thing I liked about being squirrely wasContinue reading “Captured by Commitment”

It’s Complicated

Children learn about the unseen by the way of the seen; they learn about the invisible by the way of the visible. On the threshold of hope, Diane Mandt Langberg, PhD, page 132 When you’re a child, you have no prior information to judge what is right and what is wrong. Sure, we don’t likeContinue reading “It’s Complicated”

Red Sky

Red sky at night, sailors’ delight. Red sky at morning, sailors take warning. Just as the sky dictates the weather, so it is with life. It’s been easy to follow my memories as they return to me because my life story was evident all around me. Anger was my father’s finest friend; betrayal of all thatContinue reading “Red Sky”

Secret Endowments

An endowment is a donation of money or property to an organization, which uses the resulting investment for a specific purpose. In the world of incest and abuse, this is a daily occurrence. Secret endowments are given to our abusers every time an act of perversion is made against us. With their weapons, they haveContinue reading “Secret Endowments”

Comparison is Ugly

As a child, my mother would take baths in front of me. I don’t remember her exact words but she was comparing my three year old body to hers. She was sexy and beautiful, I was not. I knew she wanted me to think of her as some kind of goddess. When I was grown,Continue reading “Comparison is Ugly”

A Pool of Blood

Memories, memories, memories. Memories did not light the corner of my mind like the song indicates. In fact, memories have darkened my life for years. There is so much discussion around memories. Do you trust them? Where do they come from? Did you manufacture them? The answer to all such nonsense is this: Do youContinue reading “A Pool of Blood”

Gorged on Intelligence

“Brilliant!” We all like to claim. What I’ve learned is that knowledge without wisdom is useless. Gathering information like squirrels gather nuts, we all run around trying to protect ourselves with it. Our stomachs are bloated with knowledge and our souls are sick from lack of rest. “Learn more about your pain, do more self-care,Continue reading “Gorged on Intelligence”

Shame Blooms in Darkness

Shame is a dark creature of the night. It was also a creature that was handed down to me in my youth. I didn’t see that my parents dripped with shame when I was growing up – and, maybe they didn’t. You have to know what you’re doing is wrong first. Maybe some people justContinue reading “Shame Blooms in Darkness”