What better way to start a week but through introspection.
QUESTION: If I asked myself the question, “How do I harm myself?” I have a myriad of ways.
Oh, we know the usual harms of hurting our flesh (over eating or self-indugent behavior of any kind). But, beyond the obvious ways — what about harming ourselves through:
- Detrimental thoughts
- Self-demeaning words
- Contaminating violations of self-abhorence
- Hating the image of yourself
- Vile words of contempt about who you are, who you’ve been or who you are not
I could make this list long, I’m sure. I have spoken more negative words to myself than I have positive ones. Isn’t that the agreement I made as a child?
The words around me in childhood were defeating — improvised words of self-hatred being taught to me. Oh the damage that tries to stay with me.
Today, I do my best to defeat this inner dialogue. It serves NO GOOD PURPOSE. But, it’s a tough one.
Father, today, I come before you and graciously ask you to teach me how to love myself on a deeper level. I am your child everyday — that should be enough but I hold myself in contempt for things I have or haven’t done. Help me find peace. Help me find deeper love. Help me be still. Perfect me in your love.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.