Reading this makes my soul tarry. I’m so sadden by the time I spent lost in dissociative patterns, not remembering all the facts associated with my childhood. I simply could not. It was too terrorizing — too much for my psyche to take.
So, I left it behind. Until it gradually began returning to me. None of it was fully gone as glimpses of the decay caught my mind from time to time. I’d reason it away — until I couldn’t.
If you have breakthroughs — trust them. It’s your mind bringing you back now because you are safe.