The point of talking about historical trauma and how it’s passed down is not to encourage abuse survivors to feel hopelessness and despair nor to feel like a permanent victim. Quite the opposite.
It’s about coming to terms with our own stories, our own past. We want to be able to offer ourselves forgiveness and compassion, to understand that much of the difficulty we may face is not our fault.
And then we can begin to truly heal and to step into greater freedom, greater hope, greater responsibility to live differently and better than before.
When we grow into adults we’re often left to tackIe the effects of trauma on our own. When someone shares their story, people need to stop asking why they waited. Or, call them a liar. Or, say they are crazy. Or, keep them ostracized as the outcast.
We need to create a culture within our families where our children – and children turned adults – don’t feel so voiceless and unprotected when confiding in their truth.
It’s never too late to have these difficult conversations. Please have them.