Domestic violence, physical abuse, sexual abuse, alcoholism, drug abuse, neglect, untreated mental illness, abandonment, loss – that is the foundation for which I experienced childhood.
I’m doing everything in my power to stop the patterns of dysfunction inherited from past generations. Generations whose parenting was informed by the look good vs the actual good. Who abused their natural power over children and forfeited the right to have any say over the raising of this next generation.
Some days I do better than others. Often, I have to fight against ingrained reactions, more often than I would like to admit. After all, while I am raising them, I am also re-raising myself.
But every day, I go to bed with ease knowing that I did my best to pick up the slack of previous generations.
I am at peace, knowing my kids are inheriting my strengths more than my faults.
I am in awe, watching them fine tune their demand to be heard and seen.
I can literally hear the cycle coming to a halt.
The light in my children’s eyes keep me going & reconnects me to the change I want to be for them; to end the dysfunction that has leaked into generations before.
“For every lie I unlearn, I learn something new.” ~ Ani DiFranco