Childhood sexual abuse sucks the life from your bones. It lives under cover but it’s current is strong. The devastation it leaves in the children who are now grown is a brutal reality of what happened yesterday. You can run from it, but I guarantee you — you can’t hide.
That is just the truth of childhood trauma. It must be dealt with head on. Grabbing the anguish, suffering, and tragedy by the proverbial horns is the only way to stop the pain, the agony, the torture.
I know. I’ve lived it.
There were days when I could scarcely take another breath. Keeping a smile on my face until I could get out of work and have a drink was about the most I could do. Suffering was my steady but I trudged on. I didn’t stop trying. I knew I would die if I didn’t get the cancer out of me.
Telling your story — confessing it to another human being is a must. You have to tell. The lies and ridicule that no one will listen, the truth that the story is just too much to bear — all of it keeps us in hiding.
Hiding is what keeps us half dead. Hiding is what our abusers asked of us. If you are hiding, you are still living by the rules of your abuser.
My life is wholly different today. Oh, I don’t walk on without the residual effects almost daily but I can say I don’t suffer as I once did. If you believed you were more than a conqueror, would you live differently? If you believed there was a love that you could never lose, would it change you?
I encourage you today to start journaling. Get it out of you. If the courage ever arises to tell someone, please do. It is like lancing the puss out of an old sore.
That is a love you can count on!