Sometimes, we have families to heal the legacy of our pasts. We date and marry to be loved into existence. But it never works. We know it doesn’t work. So why do we use the most innocent creatures on earth to try an achieve intactness?
We have children as a continuation of a lie … a lie we tell ourselves about the world. A lie we need to desperately believe. That love conquers all.
But so often, we don’t heal ourselves before making this dream a reality.
I’m trying to change that. Every day (well, most) is a battle to overcome the script that was handed down to me. The trauma that was writ in my DNA.
Babies are not born to amuse, to provide an endless projection of love. They are born to reveal, to mirror, to peel back the layers of time, to teach us things we don’t know or refuse to see, to point out our self-deceptions. But so often, we do not let them do this.
“You’ll be everything I’m not” – as if love will will the ghosts away.
Love doesn’t cure all. It’s not enough.
Telling the truth of your life, of your family legacy and all of the past and then putting in the innumerable hours is what makes love enough.