Courage to Fail

Isn’t that what it takes to love?

The galloping meadows of life are won through loss and failure. Which one of us ever made it to the top without failures?

And, by the way, what is the top?

For some, it’s a great upbringing, then college, then off to raise a family of their own – after excelling at a beautiful career.

For others, its bruises, bumps and pain all through childhood. Then, it’s off to another rocky relationship in the mate they pick because it’s what they know. After more battering and more serious losses, we pick ourselves up off the floor for the 9,000,000,000 time and stagger back into life.

The courage it took to live out my life was tremendous. I didn’t realize that it was not my failure that was keeping me stuck, it was the lack of using my God given right to choose, use my voice and tell some bad people to fuck off!

I can’t think of a better word to use there, because that’s just how it felt for me. I needed to find some anger. I needed my own battering ram for a second – it was my only way to freedom.

I get a bit tired of hearing freedom looks like this: pray, forgive, stand up and you’re healed.

Does anyone seriously believe that works?

Well, that’s was I told to do for many, many years. It kept me flat out stuck, depressed and lonely. They would say, “God wants you to move on from your past. He wouldn’t want you to dredge it back up, would he?”

These well intentioned folks cost me a lot of years stuck in misery.

Then, I found a true God. One that was bold – bolder than my past. He taught me, as he taught David in the old testament, to take down giants. “Enough with their BS! Stand and fight back,” I’d hear Him tell me.

That took courage and it took a lot of strengthen.

It hasn’t been easy to live my life, but I’m making it. Stronger than ever. Keep up the good fight. It is the road to freedom.

Never forget Romans 8:28 on the journey: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

The best is yet to come!

Published by Gracedxoxo

I have the courage to tell my story to help others embrace theirs.

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