An Avalanche of Fear

Fear seldom walks with me today, but yesterday it was all I knew.

The message that is left embedded in your soul coming through childhood trauma is fear. Fear of being hurt. Fear of trusting. Fear of the unknown and fear of the known.

But, fear is a liar.

I used to believe that my abusers held a higher power than even God held. Why not believe that?

Was my abuser held accountable by anyone but me?

Nope.

Did God come into my situation and help change things?

Oh, wait, yes He did!

He changed me. He walked me out through the road of denial until I could see the truth.

I see now that the enemy that attacked me day and night, night and day, is now a defeated foe.

Fear is mostly dead in me now. Mostly. I’d be a liar to say I never grapple with it. I do. But it’s a dragon with no head now.

O Lord, I have so many enemies;
    so many are against me.
So many are saying,
    “God will never rescue him!” 

But you, O Lord, are a shield around me;
    you are my glory, the one who holds my head high.
I cried out to the Lord,
    and he answered me from his holy mountain. 

I lay down and slept,
    yet I woke up in safety,
    for the Lord was watching over me.
I am not afraid of ten thousand enemies
    who surround me on every side.

Arise, O Lord!
    Rescue me, my God!
Slap all my enemies in the face!
    Shatter the teeth of the wicked!
Victory comes from you, O Lord.
    May you bless your people.

Psalms 3 (NIV)

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