The book the Scarlet Letter really says it all.
The novel tells the story of Hester Prynne, a woman who conceives a daughter through an affair and then struggles to create a new life of repentance and dignity. Hypothetically, it shows the estranged woman redeeming herself through her silence. By paying for her sin through servanthood to the community that ostracized her and by maintaining her silence for her entire life she earns her redemption back and regains the love of the man (a minister) who left her alone to suffer with their child.
This is a societal problem that is still with us today. The hierarchy that demands women to be silent is still strictly in place.
A victim’s problem is the sin and crime of another has resulted in our expulsion and suffering.
It’s no wonder that healing from our wounds is so terribly difficult. It carries with it a customary and obligatory sentence from society denying our right to speak about it.
This is an American problem that has been with us since our inception. The Scarlet Letter was written in 1850. Her sentence from the judgment of the community was to silently suffer and be cast away from the people.
Isn’t that what our abuse does to us? What a gift this is to all abusers!
We don’t show a scarlet letter outwardly but we wear one internally all day long. Through our night hours the sentence continues.
We don’t talk about it. We don’t tell anyone about it. We don’t even think about rehearsing the story outwardly to another person.
I share my story for the very purpose of enabling our voices. Using the territory of sound to take back what we deserve – a space to be heard.
I courageously recommend you try it!
It’s liberating, invigorating and full of life to speak – out loud, about the sins that were perpetrated against us. Don’t let the puritanical reign that is all around us silence you by telling you your worth remains in your silence.
That form of religion does you no good. In fact, it keeps you in prison. The prison of silent suffering.
There is no glory in your silence. There is no shame in using your voice.
Don’t believe the curse that a good woman keeps her story to herself. It’s a lie.