Shame Blooms in Darkness

Shame is a dark creature of the night. It was also a creature that was handed down to me in my youth.

I didn’t see that my parents dripped with shame when I was growing up – and, maybe they didn’t. You have to know what you’re doing is wrong first. Maybe some people just don’t.

Before I was old enough to think for myself, shame had become a visitor in my soul. I felt dirty, beaten up and used. What other script could have been written internally for me?

Shame is a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior. This was the only thing I saw as a child so it was an obvious conviction to continue with for me.

The opposite of shame is indifference.

Here’s another problem with coming from childhood tragedy: the foolish behavior we saw we most often recreate as we grow. Shame is now layered upon shame. It grows exponentially.

25 In the same way, was not even Rahab the prostitute considered righteous for what she did when she gave lodging to the spies and sent them off in a different direction?

James 2:25

I love the story of Rahab in the bible. She is a prostitute that comes along with biblical history. Why? Because of her faith! She and her entire family were spared when God’s people took over her city. Later, this prostitute mothered Salmon who was the father of a great man of the bible, Boaz. She was in the genealogy of Jesus.

The overcoming power of serving a gigantic God!

I’ve done all kinds of things wrong as a result of coming from shame. More than I’d like to account for…but I’m good with it now. I have a peaceful understanding and forgiveness for myself that I carry with me now.

I am also becoming indifferent to the shame of my past as I look forward to a better tomorrow.

Published by Gracedxoxo

I have the courage to tell my story to help others embrace theirs.

6 thoughts on “Shame Blooms in Darkness

  1. I love the story of Rehab too. She was a woman of faith and as a result she is an ancestress of Jesus. Shame is an awful thing, especially when the person has nothing to feel ashamed about. The perpetrator, not the victim should be the one feeling the shame.

    1. I agree with you. It’s so true that she was both a prostitute and a woman of faith. Both were true and I think many have a hard time understanding that. Thanks for your comment!

  2. You’re welcome, Jodie. We are blessed to serve a God who doesn’t reject us because of our past. When we go to Him in faith as Rehab did, He welcomes us into His family just as the father welcomed his prodigal son. All we have to do is go to God in faith and forsake our past and He will do the rest.

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