Courage and the Coward

My father was a small man that lived like a giant. His wife adored him. I was their youngest child.

Together they built a world that few ever saw into – except their children. The saddest part is that many of their children didn’t have the courage to fully look either.

What is the difference between courageous behavior and that of fear?

Courage stands and says, “I see what you did. I am not changing the behavior of your pedophilia by changing the experience through rose colored glasses. I will not only stand in what I see, if you all walk away from me, I will stand alone if I have to.”

The coward’s approach is so very different.

They see the action of abuse and minimize it’s sting. Or, sadly, many do the very opposite – they become the abuser and try to attain the power of the offender.

Abusers are built upon a steady reliance of denial. Denying their own pain and denying the pain they give to others.

Cowards lurk about seeking someone to devour; a source they can dump their own shame and inadequacies into.

Courage is the only way to stop abusive patterns and end the cycles of destruction we come from.

Is it lonely? Hell, yes! It’s lonely.

When I chose to leave my abusive marriage of 17 years, I also choose to begin walking away from my birth family. I was all done with their mistreatment – the lot of them!

In my back pocket I carried with me a Dwight Yoakam song. It became my go to when I needed a dose of strength and I relied on it often:

Ain’t That Lonely Yet

‘Cause I ain’t that lonely yet
No I ain’t that lonely yet
After what you put me through
Oh, I ain’t that lonely yet

Once there was this
Spider in my bed
I got caught up in her web
Of love and lies

She spun her chains
Around my heart and soul
Never to let go
Oh, but I survived

‘Cause I ain’t that lonely yet
No, I ain’t that lonely yet
After what you put me through
Oh, I ain’t that lonely yet

Don’t give up! Don’t give in. The reward is freedom!

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